Jesus came to pardon our sins, but He also came to heal the brokenhearted so we can walk in freedom. Freedom from pain, guilt, shame, sin, and condemnation. By His wounds we are healed. May God continue to bless us on the path to complete restoration and healing in Him.
Yesterday morning I was so excited to hear that a particular author would like to use our story in his new book! I have always wanted to be a writer but I've never known how to get my foot in the door. And I never thought I'd be writing about sexual sin and overcoming the pain, but there it is. Our story. I'm thrilled that God is giving me the desires of my heart and He is going to use our story to help other men and women who are struggling. However, my excitement soon faded and anxiety set it when I began to think about the things I still face in my marriage. Can I share our story if we still have arguments, especially about the past? If my husband slips, are we disqualified from the healing process? Do we have to start over? <?
After our First Steps meeting last night, I was feeling better. Then it all came crumbling down. We got into a huge fight about something that was discussed in group… temptation. Long story short, I felt like he lied to me about his struggles with temptations. He felt like he hadn’t. The battle ensued. I was taken aback! Here we are almost one year into the healing process and sobriety, and we’re still fighting about honesty!? How can this be? And about an hour into the argument I said, “I don’t even know why (insert author’s name) would want to put our story in his book! We’re still fighting over stuff like this!” And my husband looked at me and simply said, “OUR STORY ISN’T FINISHED YET.”
That was the turning point. He’s so right. Our story isn’t finished. Sure we’ve found immense healing and restoration in our marriage, but that doesn’t mean there still won’t be ups and downs. Sure we’ve seen great transformation in our walk with the Lord, but that doesn’t mean there still won’t be a struggle. Losing a battle doesn’t mean we’ve lost the war. It does mean we need to stand and fight. We have to be more diligent in keeping up our defenses against the enemy.
This morning my husband and I have resolved the issue. I am a little hesitant in how much to trust him. But I can TRUST GOD that He IS doing a great work in my husband and in our marriage, and He will be faithful to complete it. Our story isn’t finished, we’re writing it as we go. And there’s nothing wrong with that.
Walking in Freedom,
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