Jesus came to pardon our sins, but He also came to heal the brokenhearted so we can walk in freedom.  Freedom from pain, guilt, shame, sin, and condemnation. By His wounds we are healed. May God continue to bless us on the path to complete restoration and healing in Him.  

Repentance without Regeneration?

Posted by Kristina Croft on Friday, February 7, 2014

Can a man be truly repentant (turning from his sin) if he is not regenerate (a Christian)? This is a difficult question to answer. While a man may be aware that what he's doing is wrong or that it's displeasing to his wife, he's not aware that it's offensive to God and he's in need of a Savior. God must intervene on that man's behalf. Man is not aware of their need for Salvation or for God, until God reveals Himself to them. And so there's something to be said about a man who is open to changing his “bad habits” or “turn over a new leaf” when it comes to pornography, but unfortunately there will be no true repentance or internal heart change without Christ. The battle against pornography is just as much a spiritual one as it is a physical.

If your husband is not a Christian, sobriety may seem like an uphill battle. But don't lose hope. If he is willing to try to make a change that's wonderful. The physical boundaries are a good place to start, ie. filters and accountability software, support groups, counseling, reading recovery books, etc. Definitely do whatever you can to help him set-up those physical boundaries that will help change the behavior. We have suggested several wonderful resources on our “Books and Resources” page. You can also read through some of the blog posts “For Men” that will have great resources that can help him set up boundaries and change his physical behavior. We highly recommend The Game Plan by Joe Dallas. It's a 30-day workbook that will help him find sexual integrity and sobriety. It is written from a Christian perspective but is also very practical with a lot of benchmarks on this road to recovery.

Aside from that, you can't legislate religion. You can't “require” your husband to seek God. That doesn't work. But you and your church family need to start praying for his spiritual eyes to be awakened to his depravity so that he can truly have a changed heart. God is a God of reconciliation. Pray for deliverance, pray for healing, pray for reconciliation and restoration. PRAY. That said, MOST recovery books that you use WILL be spiritual in nature. So if he's agreed to use those resources that is great news. God can use those resources to help draw your husband to a place of brokenness and true repentance.

Don't lose hope.

Walking in Freedom,


Tags: repentance  regenerate  husband  wife  healing  reconciliation  god  salvation  prayer  deliverance  the game plan  joe dallas  x3 groups  covenant eyes 
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