Jesus came to pardon our sins, but He also came to heal the brokenhearted so we can walk in freedom. Freedom from pain, guilt, shame, sin, and condemnation. By His wounds we are healed. May God continue to bless us on the path to complete restoration and healing in Him.
I ended up going to the Emergency Room today. We waited and waited and waited. After several hours, IV fluids, and 2 doses of Zofran, the nurse finally came to take me to get an ultrasound. The technician was strict and seemed cold. Gavin was not even allowed to come in with me. She didn't want to tell me anything about my ultrasound. But I asked if I could see them. And after seeing the look of distress on my face, she turned the monitor towards me. Two hearts beating. That's what I saw. Two tiny babies, facing the camera, hearts fluttering a mile a minute. I could vaguely make out the shape of their bodies, they look like babies. Not like lima beans you usually expect this early. There they were, my two babies. Alive and well. And I was glad. I didn't shout for joy or cry. But I was glad. Not only because they were ok, but also because my reaction was good. I wasn't sad. I was glad. I know this probably doesn't make sense to a lot of moms out there, and it probably never will. But the struggle within my heart to be happy about these babies has been tremendous. But today, it wasn't a struggle. I was glad. And I know there’s still a long road ahead of us, but I'm trusting God to grow these babies... and my love for them. Walking in Freedom,Kristina
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